The Infertility Companion for Catholics

One in every six United States couples experiences infertility but Catholic couples face additional confusion, worry, and frustration as they explore the medical options available to them. Filling a major void in Catholic resources,  is the first book to address not only the medical, emotional, and spiritual dimensions of infertility, but also the particular needs of Catholic couples who desire to understand and follow Church teaching on the use of assisted reproductive technology.

I am honored to be a part of the blog book tour to support the The Infertility Companion for Catholics. I am also giving away a copy of the book. Click this link to be entered in the contest. I will take entries for one week, from April 28th to May 5th. I will draw and announce the winner on May 6th. Good Luck.

 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The authors, Angelique Ruhi-López and Carmen Santamaría, are my guests today and they wrote the following post.

 If you’re following along on our virtual travels on this blog book tour, you may have caught a glimpse into why we wrote the book with answer #1 here: http://thiscrossiembrace.blogspot.com/2012/04/q-with-authors-of-infertility-companion.html

Simone asked us to write about both why we wrote this book and what our favorite chapter(s) were and the answer to these questions are actually kind of intertwined. When we both realized we had a strong calling to write this book, we met a bunch of times to start to flesh out what content we wanted in the book so that we could include a proposed table of contents with the book proposal that we were going to send out to Catholic publishers.

Generally, when book proposals are sent out, the first two chapters are sent as examples of the book’s content. In our case, however, we opted to write and submit two chapters in the middle first: The Cross of Infertility (Chapter 6, authored by Carmen) and Bearing the Cross: A Spirituality of Infertility (Chapter 7, authored by Angelique.) The reason why we did this is because we felt these two chapters really hit at the heart of the matter of infertility and if we had to choose, we could say they’re our favorite chapters. From the very beginning, we saw these two chapters as the crux of the book and a key part of the impetus for writing the book: to help people feel like they are not alone in the difficult emotions but also to help change our perspective on the journey and see the possible fruits that could come of it.

Chapter 6 details some of the emotions and experiences of couples who carry the cross of infertility:

“For me, the feeling of dashed hopes is one of the hardest parts of the process. No matter how many times I tell myself to not grow anxious, as those days when I am supposed to get my period approach, it happens each and every month without fail. There can even be times when I may feel like the journey will never end. I know it is in God’s power each and every month, but I struggle with his answer. I try to be hopeful in my waiting, though many times the best I can muster is cautious optimism. It’s been hard to undergo this for years, to be told that a certain treatment will solve the problem and get our hopes up only to find the result is the same.”

Chapter 7 tries to look at the difficult feelings and challenges detailed in Chapter 6 and view them through a spiritual lens: “Hearing that infertility is a gift is about as thrilling as being told to “relax and you’ll get pregnant” or “just adopt and you’ll be expecting in no time.” But the truth is, we have been entrusted with this journey. We have been entrusted by God to grow in patience and to remember that not all things happen when we want them but that all things do “work for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose” (Rom 8:28).”

We hope that reading these two chapters can help you feel that you are not alone on your infertility journey. The Lord walks with you and we pray that through His grace, you may grow closer to Him in the process.

                                                                 Angelique & Carmen  

Chart Number 6

Today I started my 6th chart. This means I have been doing napro for 2.5 years. Ugh. I have to remind myself that I have made huge gains. My charts look so nice and neat. My peak day is right around cd 14. I have the correct number of WB days, my tebb is gone etc. When I first started charting everything was a mess. Yellow stamps, TEBB, Late peak etc. So I am taking this moment to remind myself of all of the small hurdles I have jumped over even though I have still not gotten to the finish line yet.

I keep resetting my clock and wonder if I being optimistic or am I in denial? I have been trying for about 5 years total. When I started napro, I reset my clock. Then when I started immunology last year, I reset my clock. Then in February when I removed polyps I reset my clock. 

This one was tough bc I talked myself back into hope. It made total sense that since this is the first time that my polyps are gone, I took meds to reduce my NK cells, meds to deal with my blood clotting, and my cycle was textbook that a miracle would happen.

When I got my BFN I was crushed but at the same time, reality hit me in the face and said duh why do you even bother??? I am trying to remain optimistic and think about my clock and that it can take a normal person 6 months. If I knew that I had the exact correct combination of meds it would be easy to wait out 6 months, but when you struggle with IF, you never know if you are doing the right thing. Every time you try something new the clock resets.

I have been selling a ton of stuff on Teachers Pay Teachers. I have been putting my focus on creating more items and advertising my store. It brings me joy and makes me feel successful. IF can make you feel like a failure so it is nice to have something to succeed at. I have also been asked to be a part of a blog tour to promote a book. That made me feel really good.

The Infertility Companion for Catholics upcoming blog book tour.

The Infertility Companion for Catholics will be going on a blog book tour from April 18 to May 2,  
 http://www.catholicinfertilityjourney.com/?p=164 

Bloggers  will be hosting  interviews, book reviews and  guest posts related to the topics of infertility, miscarriage, adoption and more. As an extra incentive, they will each be giving away a copy of The Infertility Companion for Catholics so please check them out. Here is a list of their stops.


Please stop by my blog on April 28th to get your entry in the book give away.

April 18: Matching Moonheads
April 19: This Cross I Embrace
April 20: CatholicMom.com
April 21: Chasing Joy
April 22: Frustrated Musings of a Seemingly Calm Gal
April 23: Karen Edmisten
April 24: The Thin Veil
April 25: Making God Laugh
April 26:  Patiently Waiting…Kinda
April 27: Little Catholic Bubble
April 28: Infertility Options
April 29: Lavished with Lemons
April 30: Joy Beyond the Cross
May 1: Pray, Hope, Don't Worry
May 2: A Martha Trying to Be Mary
Surprise stop along the way at: Infallible Blogma

Follicles and Flowers

Had my last US scan on Thursday. Based on my scans this month, the nurse estimated that my follicle would be mature on Saturday. I started to use some OPKs to see what day would be the best to take the trigger. I got a +opk on Sunday so I took the trigger that morning.

I spoke to my napro Dr to give him an update on my consultations with the hematologist and the immune consultant. He is great. He is so wonderful to help me coordinate with other doctors and not feel awkward about it. We have our plan for the next two months until I have my apt with the fancy immunologist in NYC in May. Then who knows what the plan will be.

I had a blow up with my neighbor. You may not remember but a little while back she stuck an ugly drain pipe in my flower bed without warning. Since we have a townhouse that is connected the rule is to  discuss this type of thing first. I got over it and decided that it was not that bad. Then the  other day I came outside and saw that she had dug up my flowers and removed my stone border in order to bury her pipe in my flower bed. UGH so my dh rang her bell to express our disappointment.

Her brother was over and he was the one who did it. We got into a loud verbal argument. He said it was her property. We said that it has been our flowerbed for 8 years and that  you ask permission before you take out flowers and ruin them. It is unclear exactly whose property is it since our houses are joined together but it is a clear violation of personal space.  Then she stared to insult my flower bed and said that it looked like sh** and it was full of weeds. This woman is about 60 and she was swearing. So it went on back and forth, until he ripped the pipe back out. (We never told them to take it out, only that we would have liked to have had input in the decision.)

Then we walked away. She later sent us a letter apologizing for the escalation but not for the action. She still felt justified in what she did. We decided to accept the apology and decided that we going to move the border of the flower bed over to what she says is our side. Then she can bury the pipe on her side and leave my flowers alone. We went to the garden store and bought some new borders and new flowers. Unfortunately it has been too cold to go out and enjoy planting flowers.

Great Day

CD10 and all is well. I went back for an US scan with my favorite nurse. My left had some small follies around 12. Then surprise, my right had the dominant one this month at 15. I was surprised bc that one does not usually take charge since it is over crowded with an endometrioma. She said there is a sliver of my ovary left and it is working this month. I am so happy that things are growing. I go back in a few days. Hopefully it will be mature by Friday.

I have just finished a 10 day course of antibiotics. UGH I forgot what they do to you. Glad that is over. I started my shots. Lovenox is really hard to do. The needle is large so it hurts going in. Then is stings later. I have been icing it before and after. This makes it  bearable, but the bruise that is left over still hurts for a few days after.

I was contacted by an author of  an infertility book for Catholics. They are going to do a guest post on my blog during infertility awareness week to launch their book. They are also giving me a copy of the book to give away to one of my readers. This will be my first blog give away. I am so excited to be involved. Make sure to check back that week for details.

 Two more days until Easter vacation from school. I gave up chocolate for lent and it has been really hard. I have lost weight, but I really miss my chocolate.