tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40359139052336520032024-03-18T23:59:59.947-04:00Simone's Journey Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.comBlogger307125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-5213630059515481162015-10-20T14:24:00.001-04:002015-10-20T14:26:48.697-04:00Tongue Tied Part 3<u><b>Tongue Update: </b></u><br />
That night we got a long piece of gauze and wrapped it around our fingers before we attempted the tongue stretches. This made a huge difference. We were able to get a grip on that slippery tongue and pull it up into position.<br />
<br />
She had two feedings the next day that were great and then she had a huge meltdown and refused to drink from the normal nipple. I texted the dr and he said it was ok to use the smaller nipple as needed to make sure she got fluids but I had to try and transition her. During that week, she seemed to be ok during the day but at night she would have a meltdown with the regular nipple. At least it was expected and I knew it was ok to let her have it. We had some good days and some bad days with feedings, but it kept getting better. <br />
<br />
<br />
I took her back for another follow up a week later and she was doing great! Now she uses the regular nipple about 99% of the time. We still
have some days where she needs to move around and find that position,
but overall things are looking great. She increased her amount of formula since her surgery. She was taking about 5 oz and now she takes about 8oz. She is also 12 weeks old now and goes much longer between meals.<br />
<br />
<br />
She has been sleeping on her back in the crib every night. She is now able to roll herself over onto her side and back. She likes to sleep on her side often. She is developing a drool rash on that side.<br />
<br />
<u><b>Adoption Update: </b></u><br />
The SW came to our new house to update our home study. Everything went well since we just had a house party and the house was very clean. It was quick since it was just a house inspection. <br />
<br />
We had to get a bunch of papers notarized and sent back to the lawyer along with a certified copy of our marriage license. We just finished the 3 month waiting period set by our state. Now we are waiting for the SW to finish her paperwork so the lawyer can file for a court date. At this point everything seems to be ok, but we won't know for sure until we go to court. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com26tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-20491002378040519422015-10-12T13:48:00.000-04:002015-10-12T13:48:00.436-04:00Tongue Tied Part 2<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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I had a real hard time doing the mouth exercises. The dr was great and even had videos online to show you, but I just felt
awkward. Her mouth was very slippery since she started to drool a lot. She
would cry in pain after I did it. I was so uncomfortable doing it. I knew it
had to be done, and I feared that it would stick back together so I just did it
the best that I could. I had dh do it at night to make sure that it was being
done hard enough. <br />
<br />
At first everything was great. She was eating from a normal bottle and was
sleeping on her back. Then things started to change. She was
doing that head shift thing again. She didn't want to eat in a normal position.
She wanted to eat lying down. She would get really frustrated and scream when
she could not latch. She is old enough that when she saw the bottle coming
toward her she knew what it was and would freak.<br />
<br />
Feeding her became a nightmare. I had to keep trying different positions and
bottle angles. I finally gave up on the silicone nipples and went back to the
rubber. That seemed to solve the problem for a few days. Then she had the same
reaction with those.<br />
<br />
She would get so worked up that I had to walk away. I would cry bc I knew
she was hungry but she could not eat. I thought to myself what did I do to my
baby??? I tried more of the mouth gel and that seemed to help. Finally we called the dr. He said that the baby might be congested and to
try the nasal aspirator. I got some good boogies out which did
seem to help. She was fine the next day. I would suction her nose before
feeding and she was ok.<br />
<br />
Today I went to feed her and it happened again. I started to cry in
frustration bc feeding her used to be easy and fun. Now it was torture. I
finally got her into a position where she was almost standing up and she
latched on and finished the bottle.<br />
<br />
I went for my follow up apt and I told him about the weird feeding position.
He said that she should be feeding at the same angle as if I were
breastfeeding. He took a look. The top lip was perfect. The tongue was
bad. The tongue had stuck back together and that is why I was having feeding
issues. He pulled on the tongue and it started to gush blood. It poured out of
her mouth and all over her shirt. She started to scream. <br />
<br />
I started crying bc I did not pull hard enough. I thought the
tongue was fine bc it did not look tied down. I guess the tip was fine but she
was also tied down underneath and that is was stuck.<br />
<br />
He asked me to get out a bottle. I only had the small rubber nipple. He told
me it was too small. I explained how I started with the large silicone but then
she would only eat with the rubber.<br />
<br />
ERGHHHHHH so now I have to keep doing the mouth pulls for another week
and pray that this time it does not stick again. I also have to use the silicone nipples. <br />
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<![endif]-->Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-67801357672267076532015-10-10T13:29:00.000-04:002015-10-10T13:29:00.035-04:00Tongue Tied<br />
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She was diagnosed as tongue tied at birth. I could see it myself. The
hospital said to have it snipped. I spoke with the pediatrician the next day.
He said it was controversial to get it snipped and he recommended to wait and
see what happens. He said to see an ENT in the future if needed. <br />
<br />
She was gaining weight and growing. She was a really good eater. I did not
think there was a problem at first. She was fond of the smaller rubber
nipples and did have some trouble latching on to the larger silicone nipples. I
was also concerned that she would develop a speech impediment so I checked the
internet to see what other moms did.<br />
<br />
I found a great forum and the moms mentioned a specialist. He was a pediatric
dentist who worked with breast feeding babies who were unable to latch. I
looked up his name and saw that he was close enough where I could drive to see
him. We made an appointment but told the nurse that it was not an emergency bc
we did not want to take an apt away from a baby in need. The apt was for
9/30 and she would be 10 weeks old. My dh told me that it was
simple and they would just zap it with a CO2 laser. <br />
<br />
On my way to the appointment, I kept thinking that this Dr was going to send
me away bc it was no big deal. OMG I was totally wrong. He looks her in her
mouth and the first thing he said was, "I can't believe that she made it
this far" I told him that I was not breastfeeding. It seems that my
baby would never have been able to latch onto a breast. She had a major
tongue tie (stage iv) and a major lip tie. I had no idea about the lip tie. I
told him that she was a really good eater except lately she has been doing this
weird thing with her head. She will turn her head and stop eating. I thought
she was just older and distracted. He said that she was breaking latch bc she
could not breathe.<br />
<br />
That is when I lost it and started crying. He said that the tongue needs to
slip under the nipple and since her tongue in not able to she cuts off her air
supply while eating. Then he said he was surprised that she was not congested
in the morning. I told him how she would not sleep on her back. He said that
she would not be able to fully breathe on her back and would have sleep apnea
or other issues. <br />
<br />
I had to watch a very explicit video on the procedure. I was in shock. It
turns out that this is major mouth surgery. I really wished my dh was there. I
have to due post surgical care and pull on her lip and tongue for two weeks to
make sure that they do not stick back together.<br />
<br />
He took my baby out of the room and brought her back 10 min later. She was
not crying. He had me feed her and she latched on the larger silicone nipple with perfection. I could not believe
the difference. He asked me if her belly got hard after eating....which it did. He said now it will be softer bc her mouth is able to function properly and get less air. He was right I am still amazed and love to feel her soft squishy belly. He said that she will be able to sleep on her back
tonight. That night she slept on her back for the first time. I was really amazed. I had no idea there were so many issues related to tongue/lip ties. <br />
<br />
I spoke to another mom who was ahead of me. Her baby was 3 months old and
much smaller than mine. She was breastfeeding but gave up nursing and had to
pump/bottle feed due to latch issues. She came from far away bc she said this
dentist was the best around. I was impressed. She said that she had consulted
many drs and lactation consultants before they finally figured out the baby had
mouth issues. Her baby was able to latch to the breast immediately after the surgery. <br />
<br />
The dr said that he gives lectures to try and bring awareness. He said that
many drs are not aware and many babies/moms suffer for months with nursing
issues. This dr also said not to go to an ENT bc they are not experts in the oral cavity and usually put the baby under anesthesia and cut. He said they don't often cut enough for fear of bleeding complications. He also said that he has had to do many corrections after a baby was worked on by an ENT. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-29536052774927514902015-10-08T13:01:00.002-04:002015-10-08T13:01:21.795-04:00Sleeping We met our baby when was she one day old. We were able to sleep over with her in the hospital that night. The next night I slept on the couch and she slept in the car seat on the floor next to me. We were about to move, so most of the house was packed up. We did not have a crib yet, but we did have a bassinet. She refused to sleep in the bassinet so I just went with the car seat since she really liked to sleep in that.<br />
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I was able to see her from the couch and rock her as needed. It worked out really well bc I would watch her breathe for awhile. At night when she started to stir I was able to hear and see her so I could get up and get her bottle ready before she started to cry.<br />
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We kept this arrangement for two weeks and then we moved. At that point my beloved couch that had seen me through multiple surgeries and had been part of my life for the past 15 years, was deemed unworthy of the new house. We put it in the basement, but probably should have tossed it. It was in great shape to look at but the springs were gone on DH side. He didn't care but it was embarrassing when someone would come over and fall into the couch.<br />
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The first week in the new house, she was 3 weeks old. I slept in my own bed and had her sleep in her room. I would get up at night, go into her room to feed her and then go back to bed. I quickly realized that this was not going to work for me. It was really hard not having her in the same room. I know most parents keep the baby in their room, but I needed to be able to move around, and turn on lights etc without having to worry about waking up DH<br />
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I went out and bought an Aerobed and placed it in her room. I was much happier bc now I could see her again and rock her as needed. It was great to be able to lay in bed and rock her in the car seat. I tried to get her to sleep in the bassinet a few times, but she would not sleep in it.<br />
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She got to the point where she would only wake me up twice a night usually around 1:30 and 4:30. At around two months of age, I finally got to paint her room. I had to move her out of her room for two weeks. I placed her in another room that I use for my office. There was really no room in there for my bed, so I went back to sleeping in my room.<br />
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I painted her room lilac and assembled the crib. I put the sheets on the bed and had it all set up but I was unable to bring myself to put her in it. The crib seemed so big and it was a big step for me. I am not sure why, but it seemed scary. After the room was ready, she went back to sleeping in her room in the car seat.<br />
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Now she sleeps through the night and she is 10 weeks old. The first night was scary bc I woke up before her. I panicked and I ran to her room to see her. She has been sleeping through the night for about a week now. I feel more sane now. Even thought she only woke me up twice a night, I was still not getting enough sleep and it is not good to get interrupted like that. I was really sleep deprived for weeks. <br />
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I found out recently why she refused to sleep on her back. I am thankful that I had the instinct to allow her to sleep upright in the car seat. (More on this in the next post)Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-84452211606843126322015-09-13T11:22:00.000-04:002015-09-13T11:22:00.052-04:00DiaperingShe was in newborn size at the hospital. The diapers had a yellow line that turns blue once wet. This was really great bc you could just open the blanket and look at the diaper. Since she was wearing a half shirt it also made it really easy to check.<br />
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She wore newborn diapers for about two weeks. Then she started size one. I can't believe how fast that happened. One day I just noticed that the newborn were getting hard to tape but the size one were too big. I finished my supply of NB and moved up to one bc I did not want her to get pinched. <br />
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Now at 7 weeks, I think she is ready to move up again, but I am trying to finish out my supply of size one. I told my family who asked, to always buy me the next size, so I do have a nice supply of size 2 waiting for me.<br />
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She goes through many diapers in one day. It is crazy. She gets really fussy when wet. Sometimes it might only be 30 min. She will get really fussy and then I think to check the diaper and there is the blue line.<br />
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At first she would poop after almost every meal. I read that it is common for breast fed babies to have this reflex but not bottle fed. It was only a tiny amount and did not really have any aroma so it was easy to deal with. As she got older, this started to change. She would a few times a day. There was more volume and it was thicker and more aromatic. Now she only goes once a day or every other day. It is really gross. It makes me nervous when she misses a day but the dr said it was normal. I even went online to check it out and looked at photos of baby poop to compare..........yes really I did that. It seems that they are only considered to be constipated when rocks come out. <br />
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My co workers had a shower for me last week and I got a diaper champ. I have been using it for almost a week and I have not filled it up yet, and I don't really smell anything. We will see how this progresses. I have two floors, so if I am downstairs I use the regular garbage. This is also something to see if I need to get another diaper pail for the downstairs or not. We have learned the importance of rolling the diaper up tight into a little ball. <br />
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My dh is getting better about doing diapers. At first he was really squeamish. He had never changed a diaper before. I did them exclusively for the first week while we got settled and then he started to take turns at my prompting. She moves around a lot and he had trouble getting the diaper to fit properly. He also has trouble mastering the concept of taking off the dirty one and quickly placing down a clean one down. He had a big accident with her pooping all over the changing table.... Now he is a pro and is really good about checking her stripe when grumpy and taking the initiative to change her. <br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-33447577359025389382015-09-11T11:00:00.000-04:002015-09-11T11:00:05.571-04:00FeedingWhile in the hospital, I made it clear to every nurse about our situation so they would not harass me about not breast feeding. I had always planned to try it out, but it's out of my control now and I am okay with it. We bond during feeding. She looks up at me and grabs my finger. I get to hold her tight. Taking care of a little baby is really hard and I can't
imagine all the extra work it takes to breastfeed including having sore
leaky boobs etc. I give those women credit. <br />
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They gave me 2 ounce similac premixed bottles. They were great. You just unscrew the top and put on a nipple. They were very strict about how much to feed her. They told me about one ounce and it had to be at least 3 hours. They said her stomach was very small so we had to be careful.<br />
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She would become fussy and cry and my gut told me she was hungry. The nurses would not let me feed her until three hours had passed. I was up all night until about midnight when the nurses took all the babies to get their stats. She returned the baby asleep in a tight swaddle. I asked her how she got her to sleep. She told me that she likes to suck on her gloved finger, so I should get her a pacifier at home bc the hospital does not stock them.<br />
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She went to sleep and I expected her to wake me up but she never did. I woke up around 6:30 am and thought she was dead. I jumped up and freaked out. I went over and woke her up. She was fine and had a bottle. The nurse got mad at me and told me that I should have woken her up... ERGH well nobody said anything so how would I know.<br />
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When the sw arrived, the baby was screaming again and I thought she was hungry but it had not been 3 hours. The SW said she had never heard such a loud cry from a newborn. She agreed that the baby was very hungry and got me some food. She said that sometimes when they do not get a lot of prenatal care they crave nutrients once born and try to make up for lost time.<br />
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We saw the dr the next day and I told him what the nurse said. The dr told me that I could feed her every 2-3 hours and that I should not wake her up to feed at night. <br />
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I used the premixed bottles for a few weeks. They were so easy and helped me through the chaos of moving etc. At some point I knew I would have to start mixing powdered formula due to the cost. My dh coworkers got us a formula machine that is amazing. She started using the powder during the day, but I still use the premixed at night and when I travel. I am still transitioning my whole life and I need to keep some things simple.<br />
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She quickly increased her intake of formula. I tried to figure out how much to feed her. Some sites said 2.5 oz per pound her day, and she was doing a little less than that. I do a combo of child led and parent let feeding. I feed her if she awakes or is fussy in the 2-3 hour window. The dr said you can't really hurt her by giving too much bc if you over feed the baby it will spit up. I increased her amount slowly and I tried to watch her to see if she was still hungry after feeding. She never spits up and she will make a yuk face when she is not hungry.<br />
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At 7 weeks old, she is up to about 5 oz per feeding. At her last Dr Apt for her one month checkup, she had gained 2 pounds. She went up from 8 to 10 which he said was great. I expressed my fear that she was not eating enough. He said all moms feel that way. Then I reminded him that I am still under supervision so I worry that I will get into trouble.<br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-129795517745886362015-09-09T09:25:00.000-04:002015-09-09T09:25:00.040-04:00ClothingWhen she was in the hospital she wore a T shirt (side snap kimono style) diaper and blanket. The SW had told me to bring an outfit to take her home in. I had a cute outfit that I bought for this day and when I put it on her I quickly realized that snaps are horrible. There were snaps all the way up and down her legs. I had no idea that babies wriggle around and kick their legs so much. Even at two days old this girl had leg power.<br />
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The next day, I went out and bought a bunch of T-shirts like she had in the hospital. OMG so much better. For the first two weeks, she had the umbilical stump, so I liked having the half shirt to keep air flowing. The dr said not to do anything to the stump. <br />
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After the stump fell off, I thought I would put her in a onesie since this was the one item that everyone mentioned over and over again. I put the first one on and it was tough to get it over her head without her getting really upset. It was really tough to get her arms into the holes since they were very rigid and I was worried about hurting her. It was so much more work than the simple side snap. <br />
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Then I was getting ready to leave the house and her diaper blew out the side and the onesie got messy on the bottom. ERGHH so I just cut off the bottom and left the house bc I could not deal with trying to get it off and then put another one back on. On that day, I hated onesies and did not really get the appeal. She went back to the side snap. <br />
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She continued to wear the side snap, diaper, blanket combo for the first 4 weeks. It was so easy. I could quickly open the blanket and check the diaper. Then since the T-shirts were side snap they did not have to go over her head. They were very easy to get onto her arms too. The shirts were white and I found that oxy clean totoally got out any formula/drool stain. I did also buy her a bunch of newborn sleepers with zippers. They were hard to find bc most sleepers had snaps. The sleepers were great and she wore them during the day if it was cold. They did not have to go over her head and they were quick to open and close. <br />
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After the first month, she started to get more active and the side snap would start to ride up. That is when the light bulb went off why the onesie is so great. I also was just out of my 30 day return period so I felt more comfortable taking the tags off of her clothes. I started to dress her in onseis and now I love them. She has a ton bc that is what everyone gives you. She has all sorts of colors and it has been really fun to "dress" her up.<br />
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If I ever got the chance again, I would still start out with the side snap shirts/zipper sleepers until about 4 weeks old. She is so much bigger now and fits into 0-3 months clothes at 7 weeks old. She does not seem to mind getting dressed now, so I am wondering if her head is more solid and when she was younger maybe it was more sensitive. I also found that putting her arms into a onesie early on was very hard and it is much easier now, so maybe her arms are more flexible.<br />
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Friends and family continue to drop off clothing. I am starting to get larger sizes which is great. The larger sized clothing looks more like real clothing. There are dresses, shorts, etc. I had a huge bag of clothes so one day I sorted them all out and put them into her closet by size. <br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-6868780103082603672015-09-07T09:02:00.001-04:002015-09-07T09:03:58.801-04:00Moving into the new house<br />
When she was about 2 weeks old, we moved into our new house. This was quite challenging with a small baby. Thankfully we have some great friends who helped us move the smaller stuff so we could save money and only pay movers for the large furniture. We had lived in that house for 12 years and could not believe how much stuff we had packed into that house. This was a great chance to organize and purge. It took us about two weeks to move enough stuff over before we got the movers. Towards the end it was difficult bc most of our stuff was in the new house but we could not sleep there since our furniture was still in the old house.<br />
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The day the movers came, we watched them pack up our stuff and then we all went over to the new house. There was a ground bee nest near the front walkway that we explicitly told the movers to avoid. Everything was going great until one mover walked in and said he got stung. I went into first aid mode and got him some ice for the sting and some water. He asked for some benedryl. I thought nothing of it. After a few minutes he started to look a little pale and my gut told me that I should call 911. We were not really sure and debated about it. Then he says he's going to pass out and he is allergic to bees. WHAT? really, so you are allergic to bees, and never mention this until the last minute??? UGHH so we call 911 but he had been stung a good 5 min or more before we called, so it didn't look good.<br />
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I was holding the baby outside on the phone with the operator waiting for them to arrive. I could hear in the background that this guy was getting sick...........ergh thankfully not on my new floor bc someone found an empty gift bag. I told the operator and she said it was normal but that did not make me feel better. I started crying and freaking out. She told me if he passes out I have to do CPR on him. I thought he was going to die.<br />
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They took about 10 min to get there. They finally got there and said that the benedyl probably saved his life. He was going to be okay and then they took him out on the stretcher. His coworkers had no idea he had an allegery and he was a new hire.<br />
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It took me about a week to stop seeing his body passed out on my floor. <br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-47333280193763522402015-08-03T15:17:00.003-04:002015-08-03T15:20:06.374-04:00She's HereOn Sunday July 19 we got a voice mail from the sw saying that the baby had been born and she was healthy. She called me back on Monday to say that everything was going as planned. They were going to visit bm in the hospital at 2pm with the lawyer to sign papers. We were to arrive at the hospital at 3pm and wait in the lobby. The sw would call us to tell us if she had signed the papers or not. We also found out that we had the chance to say overnight and take care of the baby.<br />
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We arrived at the hospital with our gift bag and asked for the delivery section We sat anxiously in the lobby waiting for the call. We got the call and everything was done. We went upstairs and met the bm. She was holding our daughter. It was really awkward since it was our first time meeting her. She was sweet. She gave me the baby to hold. I just sat there staring at the sleeping baby. It was amazing. We gave the bm her present and then the sw led the discussion.<br />
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We spoke for a while and then the sw told her that we would take the baby to the next room and asked her to say good bye. I handed her the baby and asked if she wanted to be alone. She said it was ok. She said good bye and we wheeled the baby next door. The bm was discharged that day. <br />
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As I walked in the room with dh, the baby, and the sw I started to cry tears of joy. I could not believe this was really happening. We spoke with her for awhile and then she left. The baby was asleep so dh and I looked at each other and did not know what to do next.<br />
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He went out to get us some food. I stayed with the baby. We spent the night. I made sure to tell the nurses about our situation and that I had no idea of what I was doing. They were really great. They taught me so much.<br />
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We took the baby home the next day. We had to take her to the dr for a check up. She is really healthy. 8 pounds, 19 inches. She passed all of her newborn tests including the drug screening that the agency requested. She is very sweet. I love her already. <br />
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In our state the bm has 30 days to change her mind. The sw said not to post her name or photo on the internet until after the 30 days. The sw has already spoken with bm a few times and she is doing well. We have gave the sw some prints to give the bm of us holding the baby and some of the baby sleeping and awake. <br />
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We have had her home for 2 weeks now. Which is half way! I have been very busy. She eats every 2-3 hours. Then she needs to burp and get a diaper change, so by the time she goes to sleep it is almost time to eat again.<br />
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She is amazing. I love her and had an immediate bond with her from the moment she was first placed in my arms. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-87009243634496454262015-07-19T10:33:00.000-04:002015-07-19T10:33:11.586-04:00UpdateWe decided that we would contact the sw on Monday 7/20, since that would be a week since the last time I contacted her. On Friday, 7/17, I got a phone call from the sw.<br />
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The sw said that the bm had gone to the hospital and she might be in labor. We spoke a little bit about the next steps. She said that we had to wait and see what the bm wanted to do. She might want to see us right aft birth or she may wait until discharge time. The could be 2 days for natural birth and 4 days for c-section. She said that we might bring this baby home on Sun or Mon. <br />
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She also mentioned that discharge could take 3 hours and we had to attend a newborn care class.<br />
I got really excited and called dh. The bm went to a local hospital that specializes in women's issues. Everyone around here loves that place. It is small and has great staff. The sw also said that they are very adoption friendly. She called them to remind them of the case details and gave them our names.<br />
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After I got off the phone with her, I went into cleaning mode. I think it was a combination of trying to keep my mind off of it while also making sure my house was ready for a baby.<br />
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A few hours later the sw called back and said it was a false alarm. The bm was not in labor so they sent her home. I was expecting to get another call back that night or the next day, but here I am on Sunday with no news.<br />
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The positives that I am focusing on are the fact that I actually got a call when she went to the hospital. I am very happy about that since I was under the impression I would only get a call after the birth. This means that I will get a day or two prior notice. She saw the dr on Fri which makes me feel better knowing that everything seems to be ok.<br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-2901121043296211242015-07-16T10:53:00.001-04:002015-07-16T10:53:36.142-04:00Trying to be PatientWe found out about this baby about 4 weeks ago. I only really started to feel like I was waiting about two weeks ago. The due date was yesterday, so now I feel like I am stuck in the 2ww but I can not poas.<br />
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I emailed the sw on Monday to try and get an update. I was surprised when she wrote me back later that day. She said that the bm was doing well and she was still extremely pregnant. She had a dr apt later that day and the sw would try to get an update on Tues.<br />
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Now it is Thurs and I never heard back from the sw. I can't harass the sw and risk getting her mad, so I have to be very careful about how often I contact her. She has been very nice to me lately so I don't want to jeopardize that.<br />
<br />
We are trying to be patient but it is very hard. I am trying to focus on the positives" the bm is seeking medical attention at this point, and she is still interested in us. I told dh to enjoy our dinkhood while it lasts. This has helped him a little. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-65008781759889721452015-07-11T16:18:00.000-04:002015-07-11T16:18:00.164-04:00Pack N PlayMy friend gave her pack n play to another friend a few years back and now it was going to be mine. I figured it would make a good temporary crib until after we move next month. I really didn't want to get a crib yet anyway.<br />
<br />
My friend brought the pack n play over and we attempted to set it up. There was no instruction manual but there were some instructions written on the bottom. It seemed really straight forward. Get the sides to lock. We tried for over 30 min and could only get one side to lock. We tried pulling up. Then push the button in while pulling. We kept hearing a sound like it had locked but then it would not stay. She called the primary owner and asked her about it. She mentioned that she had a hard time with it too.<br />
<br />
We decided that it must be broken bc we were able to get the one side to lock. We went to the store to go look at new ones and try out the floor models just in case we had missed something and needed to ask someone at the store for help. We got the floor model and we were able to unlock and re lock the sides with no issues. I debated about whether or not to buy a new one in the store. It was cheaper on Amazon so I decided that I would order one when I got home and hoping that it would get here before the baby.<br />
<br />
We went back to my house and started to fold it up for the trash. That is when my friend yells out "it locked." I could not believe it. We then were able to lock the other 3 sides in two seconds. We unlocked and then made sure we could lock it again. This time it was so simple.<br />
<br />
It turns out that you have to lock the sides first before pushing down the center to made the bottom flat. When we did sides first, it was simple. When we had previously done bottom first it would not lock the sides.<br />
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We had a good laugh about this. <br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-51501326977590623582015-07-08T16:02:00.001-04:002015-07-08T16:02:54.348-04:00Gender Reveal<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXuDPdyeVe0gSQtRfcnbZXzM0602DGY1fVfx76yj_f2sqjSvmbJGDolGvQgjdy5p2JV1h2kJPRiUFcZ9OMEm0OrnyuVo4KrWP9YAhvp_AjmZUhI_Zsa9oym9Ax0RYi3dy_Z8RZidQcIrsM/s1600/20150706_171303.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXuDPdyeVe0gSQtRfcnbZXzM0602DGY1fVfx76yj_f2sqjSvmbJGDolGvQgjdy5p2JV1h2kJPRiUFcZ9OMEm0OrnyuVo4KrWP9YAhvp_AjmZUhI_Zsa9oym9Ax0RYi3dy_Z8RZidQcIrsM/s320/20150706_171303.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
I went to the store with the intention of buying gender neutral clothing. I don't really mind yellow or green so I thought it would not be a big deal. When I got to the store I quickly realized that there is a very limited selection of gender neutral. All of the cute stuff was very specific to one or the other.<br />
<br />
I fell in love and just had to buy a few things in pink or purple. This little dress and sweater was my favorite. I texted it to my family for a gender reveal. So now you know that the baby is a girl. It makes it more exciting and more scary at the same time.<br />
<br />
I went out and got the basics to satisfy the social worker which was clothes, food, and diapers. My friend gave me a car seat and a pack n play. I spent about $300 on basics and even tried not to spend that much.<br />
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<br />
I bought some newborn and some 0-3. Some of my friends said that their baby was small enough for newborn at birth and others said they went right to 0-3. I made a list of what I got at each store so I could return it if needed. I am not opening up anything until I see how big the baby is. <br />
<br />
I put everything out in the living room for DH to see. He did not say anything. This has been really hard on him so I knew that I had to find a way to expose him to things without pushing him too far. I asked him about it and he started to open up about his fears. We had a great talk.<br />
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<b>One week until due date!</b>Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-13802764913898680882015-07-01T16:19:00.004-04:002015-07-01T16:19:43.552-04:00Paperwork PreviewToday we went into the office to see the SW and go over the papers we will sign once the baby is born. We have to sign many papers stating that we understand the risks. They cannot guarantee what the health of the child will be and the bm has 30 days to change her mind etc. They will do some testing of the baby and the bm at the hospital to check for basic health and do a drug screen. <br />
<br />
It was a nice meeting. We had heard most of the case details before. There was one surprise. The bm did not pay her insurance bill. When the sw found out, she paid, but it was too late and now the bm has none and needs to reapply. We might have to cover the delivery bill which would be a few thousand more. She said sometimes the hospital will cut you a break when you are the adoptive parents. The sw is trying to get the issue straightend out and she said that if it goes through they might be able to get it covered even after the baby is born. We would not have to pay for this until after the 30 days since we would not be respobsible unless we keep the baby. Although this could be more money I don't care unless it is nonrefundable. I have come this far already.<br />
<br />
The sw told us to keep going with this case. She congratulated us on making it this far. It is a weird place to be in. I am very excited to have made it this far. I am excited that the plan is that I will take this baby home. I am scared to get too excited bc this is not permanent yet.<br />
<br />
She said after the 30 days are up then we go to court to file for pemanent placement. She told us to tell our family to think of it as we will be foster parents for 30 days. She told us not to have a party yet. I had to laugh bc I have nothing set up and I told my family already no parties until the 30 days are up.<br />
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My friend gave me a car seat. So far that is the only thing I have. I might go shopping this weekend and get a few things to hide in the house.<br />
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The sw asked us if we knew the gender. She never mentioned it so I just assumed they did not know. She knew and asked us if we wanted to know. I was afraid and then I looked at dh, I was shocked when he wanted to know. We found out.............It is crazy that even though you are happy for either, knowing makes it more real. I am not telling anyone yet. I need to process this first. <br />
<br />
Count down to the due date: 14 days<br />
<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-79367042343941182622015-06-24T19:05:00.002-04:002015-06-24T19:08:50.225-04:00Annual Home InspectionThe sw came to my house for our annual inspection. This experience was totally different than last year. Last year she started out with insulting me about my clutter and how small my house was.This year she came into my house and was nice. She complimented me on how clean my house was. I just smiled and thanked her. She said that I really cleaned up nice. Again, I smiled and nodded. It is amazing how the timing worked out, bc we had to clean out the house to sell it.<br />
<br />
Then she tells me that I am a totally different person this year. She
said last year I was depressed and I got really mad at her when she
mentioned my clutter...... OMG so I had to just smile and nod. She said
all of my stuff was keeping me down and now I am free. I smiled and nodded bc even though it was kind of annoying, she was being nice and was complimenting me. If you spoke to her you would think
I should be a guest on hoarders.<br />
<br />
I showed her pictures of our new house. I think that also helped a lot
to set the mood bc she loved that house and knew that we would be living
there soon. She reviewed our home study. This time it was easy bc we only had to confirm that the information was the same. Last year she interviewed us and it was really tough. <br />
<br />
We spoke again about case #5 and she said that the bm was still interested. She was going to see her soon and make sure that she was still on board with this plan. We are not going to meet her.<br />
<br />
The sw said that this woman could deliver any day. We are both leaving the area for a few days this weekend, but she said it was ok. Then if we take the baby home, she would come back to the house in three days to make sure we had a bassinet, food, clothing, and diapers.<br />
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Today the sw wanted money for the bm's lawyer. This is the furthest we have ever gotten.<br />
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HMMMM this might be getting real. <br />
<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-81556527741392127232015-06-19T19:43:00.005-04:002015-09-19T09:44:35.448-04:00Case #5 is open againWe have a buyer for our house!<br />
<br />
One day while I was out watering the flowers, a man drove by and asked me what I thought of my house. We spoke for a few minutes and then I gave him a flyer and invited him to the open house at the end of the week. I got his name.<br />
<br />
At the open house we had 8 people stop by. This man was one of them. He made an offer. It was too low so we countered. Then he came up a little bit and said it was his final. We were unable to take it. His agent said that he would be going with his second choice.<br />
<br />
About two weeks later he came back with a higher offer and we accepted. He put down a deposit and signed the initial paperwork. The inspection is next week.<br />
<br />
The closing will be about two weeks after we close on our new house. I set it up this way so we could have two weeks to pack and move into the new house with less stress. This made it a little tougher financially bc we are selling second and have to use all of our savings up front. When we sell, we will get everything to balance out.<br />
<br />
A few days after we settled on this deal, the SW called. She said case#5 was back open. This is the third time that this case has come to our attention. It seems this time that the bm is fighting with her mother and moved out of her house. Her mother was going to file custody and is not going to anymore.<br />
<br />
The sw wanted to know if we were still interested. The due date is July 15. We had to think about this. Three times could be a good sign or it could be a sign that this is just too unpredictable. We also are in a pickle bc all of our money is tied up in the house. We had planned on borrowing against the new house once we closed in Aug. If the baby is born in July we won't have the money, bc the sw wants 20K right after the baby is born. I thought about what to do and was thinking that if we didn't have the money then it was not meant to me. <br />
<br />
I spoke to my friend, who said she would help me out by lending us the money. WOW, I would have never asked her. <br />
<br />
I called the sw back and told her that we are still interested. I told her we are moving. She was fine with that. She said we need to redo our homestudy in Aug. That stinks bc it is up this month. I thought they would only charge us a small amount to come back in Aug for the home inspection. They are going to charge us $450 in June to do the annual review and then another $450 in Aug to just come do the house inspection.<br />
<br />
I am excited that this may be the one. I am trying not to get too excited bc this woman is very unpredictable and keeps changing her mind. I am so glad that I have the house to keep my busy. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-11784602830736041332015-06-14T15:32:00.002-04:002015-06-14T15:32:24.190-04:00Working on the HouseIt has almost been a month since we listed our house for sale. We have continued to work on the house every day since then. It is crazy that we listed our house and we were not really ready. I don't regret it bc we tend to be perfectionists sometimes and I just had to get it listed or I knew it would never happen. <br />
<br />
I started with touching up paint in every room. I had a few spots that I missed, some chips near the corner or floor, or some spots on a wall that would not come clean. This quickly became a huge project bc not all paint cans were usable. Some were really old, rusty, and gross. I had to get more paint. I also needed more brushes bc I wanted to paint more than one color at a time. After I cleaned out all of the closets, I realized that they also needed to be repainted. <br />
<br />
The master bedroom was the worst. We had a stress crack going from the ceiling to the floor. It was there when we bought the house, we had fixed it and it came back, so we had left it alone. I plastered the crack and when I repainted it, I quickly realized that the wall was no longer the same color and the repair stuck out. The color had faded from the sun. I had to repaint the whole room. I love the fresh color. <br />
<br />
After we cleaned out the garage, I had to plaster some holes, repaint the walls and the floor. The floor had been painted gray by the previous owners. A lot of it had come off, there was white paint, rust etc all over the floor. It really needed to be paved, so I decided to repaint the floor gray and it looked amazing.<br />
<br />The linen closest is four ft long and had metal shelves that I had covered with shelf paper when we moved in. I totally forgot about them until I cleared out the closet. I went to Home Depot to buy some wood boards and paint them. They look amazing in the closet. The closet used to be 12 in deep, now it is 16 in deep. We got some cute baskets to keep our stuff neat and hidden in the closet. <br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-41859479030251296422015-05-19T16:25:00.002-04:002015-05-19T16:25:55.013-04:00Offically ListedOur house has been officially listed and there is a sign post in our front yard. YEAH. I am so excited. It was a lot of work but so much easier than filing for adoption. My house has never been so clean for so long. DH is really motivated to sell quickly so he has been picking up after himself....<br />
<br />
We still have a little work to do with the closets and garage. I am fine with someone seeing them but it would be more ideal to straighten them up and organize them. Today is the first day in a few weeks that I did not have to work on the house, so I get to relax. It feels great and I am so happy that I accomplished my goal of getting it listed.<br />
<br />
Hopefully we can sell it soon. Our townhouse is part of a four family unit and we are on the end. This is very desirable when looking for a townhouse since you are not stuck in the middle of others and you get more land. <br />
<br />
<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-50316661774895054772015-05-16T12:28:00.000-04:002015-05-16T12:29:56.668-04:00The Photographer<br />
The real estate agent, was waiting for the photographer outside of our house. The photographer was really late and finally called the real estate agent. He said that he was done taking photos and he was surprised that the agent did not show. The real estate agent, tells the photographer that it is impossible bc he was waiting outside of our house the whole time.<br />
<br />
He tells him that he went to the wrong address. Same street different house number. The real estate agent asks the photographer if he just did the outside. Nope, he did the inside too. It seems that the photographer rang the bell and a man answered. The photographer tells him that he is there to take pictures bc the real estate agent, requested his services so they can list the house. The man lets him in. The house is a total mess but the photographer takes the photos anyway.<br />
<br />
Later on a police car drives by and stops at my house to ask the real estate agent why he is taking photos of the outside of the house bc that guy called the police. Then the real estate agent, tells him about the mix up. The officer says that it must have just been the outside. Then real estate agent, tells the officer that the man let the photographer into his home and allowed it to be photographed even though it was a mess and he was not going to list it.<br />
<br />
OMG I was hysterical hearing this story. DH and I hypothesized that this man must have let the photographer in and then called his wife who said that she was not expecting a photographer and they were not listing their house. That is probably when he called the police.<br />
<br />
It felt good to laugh bc we have been so serious these past few weeks. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-38328334958615488132015-05-10T10:25:00.003-04:002015-05-10T11:56:56.894-04:00Made an OfferI wanted to keep looking for a house that we both loved. DH was done looking and wanted to get something now. I always take forever to make a decision but he is very decisive. He said we could get one of the houses that I loved...................EEEEEKKKKKK<br />
<br />
We put in an offer on a house that was only on the market for about a week. We tried to stay calm and not get too excited bc we knew that it might be too late already. We also put in an offer that was below asking price. They countered our offer with a little more. We accepted.<br />
<br />
It does not seem real to me that I bought a house. I am still very cautious bc it is not official until closing and anything can happen. We put down a deposit and will close at the end of July. They don't want to move out until the end of August bc they are building a new house and can't get in until then. They will pay us rent for one month. <br />
<br />
<br />
We found a mortgage that will help us out. It is adjustable so we don't need to put down 20%. We can still avoid PMI and only put down 10%. This will help us tremendously when trying to arrange money for the adoption and the new house.<br />
<br />
Now I have to get my house listed and sell it. I have been working every night to declutter, visit the storage unit, and paint. My main project is still the garage. I have painted most walls and most of the ceiling. I started to paint the floor grey and it looks amazing. As soon as that is done, we can finish moving stuff out of the other rooms into the garage and clean.<br />
<br />
<b> Adoption News:</b><br />
Case number five is closed for now. The grandmother is going to file for
custody bc the bm is not legally allowed to parent. I am fine with this bc I knew in my heart that it was really
iffy. I never got attached to this one. I have also been so busy with the house that I did not have
time to get my hopes up. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-20799771711856043842015-05-03T09:25:00.003-04:002015-05-03T09:25:30.617-04:00Case #5 ReopenedWe have been very busy looking for a new house. It has been exciting but exhausting. Every other night we would go out to look at something and then the other night we would pack up stuff in our current house. We also made runs to the storage unit. Looking at other houses is great research when you are selling your own house. I realized how important it is to declutter and clean your house. It is amazing the range that I saw from totally empty vacant to full blown they live here and you can totally tell they are slobs. <br />
<br />
We got a few car loads out of our house and it already looks so much larger. We also found a bunch of hot spots that need some TLC like paint touchups or that hole in the back wall of the garage that I never bothered to patch.<br />
<br />
Then in the middle of the day last week, my dh calls me and said that the sw called him to say that case #5 was back open. This was the case that I got the call in March and the bm chose another couple. It seems that the couple backed out and now we are it. This case seems very unstable. The other couple who already experienced a take back decided they could not risk it.<br />
<br />
Since the due date is not until July and we are still in full blown house hunt, we said yes. I am not really sure exactly what is going on and we still have to meet with the bm. I am not getting my hopes up since the details seem iffy and there are still two months to go. We are rolling the dice for now and not telling anyone about this bc they won't understand and I don't want to get their hopes up.<br />
<br />
At least for now, it seems that this was meant to be. We would not have been able to afford both the house and the adoption, if we adopted first bc we would have used our cash. Since we are going for the house first we can use our cash for the down payment and then borrow from the house for the adoption. It is crazy bc you end up paying the same amounts but the down payment must be in cash and the adoption can be a loan so you have to get the puzzle pieces to fit just right. <br />
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<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-9099250537933318082015-04-25T21:24:00.003-04:002015-04-25T21:24:50.619-04:00Home Study Annual Renewal It is that time already. We are starting the process of renewing our home study. So far DH got his physical done, mine is next week. We had to get papers notarized swearing that we have not committed any crimes. They also ran our finger prints again. We have to have another home visit in May.<br />
<br />
I started to think that maybe if I had a nicer house with a huge backyard, I could update my profile book and be more attractive to a BM. We were also tired of waiting around for a baby so we decided that it was finally time to move.<br />
<br />
For the past three weeks we have been consumed with house hunting. It has been great. We are happier and have really enjoyed the hunt. We signed up with an agent and started to look online. We went to a bunch of open houses and had our agent get us a few showings. I saw a bunch that I loved and so did DH but they were not the same ones. It will be difficult for us to find something that we will both love. <br />
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We are tying really hard to get our house ready to get listed. Today we sent our first car load of stuff to the storage unit. We are going to declutter our house as much as possible to make it look larger and more appealing. <br />
<br />
I have to laugh bc we have been very responsible up until this point. Now we are taking a huge risk bc we have to sell our house and find a house to buy that is affordable while keeping in mind the expensive adoption that we also have to pay for.Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-30812920199566538092015-04-06T06:14:00.002-04:002015-04-06T06:18:44.831-04:00Easter SundayWoke up and it was CD 1. This was only a 21 day cycle. That has been the norm for me for awhile so I was kind of expecting it, but still in denial hoping that it would not show for another week. One of these days I will deal with this and see the dr for more progesterone. I was not feeling well and was not looking forward to a long drive to see my family. I did want want to go but I made dh promise me the other day that he would make us go bc I had not seen my family in a few months. The car ride was easy, the roads were full but no major traffic jams.<br />
<br />
We walk in the door and were greeted by family members. It was nice and I was really happy that I made it. Then my mom pulls me aside to tell me that my cousin who is not married got his girlfriend pregnant and she is having a girl due in Sept. Woah ambush. He is 32 so at least he is not too young, but it was a total surprise since I think that first time she came around was Thanksgiving so I know that they have not been dating that long. That means it was unplanned and did not take long. UMMM so jealous. At least I found out about my cousin's baby in person and not on FB. <br />
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They are both quiet and shy so I think they were also embarrassed at not being married so things were mostly quiet about it. At first I was relived bc I was still in shock and panic mode and was not sure if I would be able to make it. At the end of the night, I was starting to feel better about it, but I was still very sad for myself and my parents.<br />
<br />
There were three small children there and so of course everyone talks about them and how cute they are and how they wish there were more children around........ummm burn. Then of course everyone loves to start telling birth stories. My sister gave birth in her car and we had to hear that story again...........ergh oh and then she says how it cost her $3,000 to have her child bc that is her deductible. I had to bite my tongue. Yeah I am sure that for most fertile people who have fertile friends who pay little to nothing for the hospital that is a lot of money. I have already put down $8,000 deposit and have nothing to show for it so paying $3,000 to bring home a healthy baby is pocket change.<br />
<br />
Over all I had a nice visit and I was glad that I came. I had a lot of nice conversations with family members. I played with some of the kids which was fun. <br />
<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-10859602999505537912015-03-11T19:48:00.000-04:002015-03-11T19:48:53.184-04:00Case #5 UpdatedDh called me today during work and said the SW called him. I got really excited until he said that the bm chose another couple. On the bright side at least the SW called us this time and we did not have to wait to call her.<br />
<br />
This one hit me really hard. I feel the sadness and disappointment of a bfn. The bm was due at the end of the school year which is perfect timing for me. I tried for years to have this happen on my own. Every year when it would line up I would get excited and then nothing happened. Today I got slapped in the face again.<br />
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We did not get any calls for two months and then this was over in a flash. Who knows when the next chance will come along? I am getting really discouraged. I am losing my patience. I want to take all the money I have saved for this adoption and just run away to the Caribbean. <br />
<br />
I wanted to give the sw a few months to see how many cases we got. Now I am starting to wonder how much I need to start advertising on my own. I didn't really want to do this for many reasons, but now I worry that I have to. <br />
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Friends and family are starting to get discouraged too bc they don't understand how this works. They are complaining to me that this is taking too long and that really annoys me. I am trying to keep my cool but I want to yell profanities at them. Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4035913905233652003.post-22297431499834902832015-03-07T15:15:00.004-05:002015-03-07T15:24:02.534-05:00Case #5January and February were very silent. We did not get any calls. Then in the first week of March we got a call. This BM is due early July.We agreed to show our profile. Now we are waiting to hear back on whether or not our profile gets selected to go to the next round. I will wait about two weeks before I contact the SW.<br />
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This was the first time that the due date was not in the same month as the call. While it is nice to have more time to prepare, there is also more time to wait before the baby is born and worry about the bm changing her mind and choosing to parent.<br />
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<br /><b>Agency Stats for number of couples listed:</b><br />
<br />
My state 29<br />
---My local branch 3<br />---Western Branch 8<br />---Southern branch 18<br /><br />
The other two states combined 20<br />
<br />Simonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11707429755251982900noreply@blogger.com1