Saturday, December 20, 2014

BM Meeting

I am sure that everyone is curious about how it went....................

We were both excited the night before and could not sleep. We got up at 5:30 and were ready to leave by 7 am. It was a three hour drive and our apt was at 11am so we wanted to get there on time and make sure that we allowed for getting lost, traffic etc.

We were on the road for about an hour when the SW called to tell us that the BM cancelled the meeting bc on of her kids was very sick. I was disappointed but I understood that her kids come first. We decided to just keep driving and visit my parents who live a little further down in the same direction.

On the way down, my dh had a meltdown. It was all the stuff he has been holding in for the past 8 years. At first I thought it was good for him to get some of it off of his chest but then he just kept going on and on. I think for me it was easier to separate the pain from infertility from the hope of the adoption. For him, it has just been one long painful roller coaster.

We had a good visit with my dad and I think it was a good distraction. On the way home, dh took a long nap and then we had a long talk. He is really frustrated and this part is really hard for him.

I have lots of flexibility with my job so if I have to just take off the next day, I can. His job is understanding but he has limited days off to use and dh is upset that he might have to burn his time off for nothing. We spoke about how it will be all worth it some day, but it is hard for DH to visualize that possibility. He is not a gambler by nature and does not take a lot of risks.

The SW updated us a few days later and said that they are giving the BM some space bc her kids are still sick, she is concerned about the holidays next week, she is very close to her due date. So basically we have to be ready to  run if we get a call to reschedule.

At this point, with her due date being only ten days away and Christmas in the middle, I would imagine that we might not meet until after she gives birth. At least we would have a better idea if she really wants to go through with the adoption. Then if we interview at the hospital and she picks us, we would just take the baby home which would save us a trip.


  1. Well...there is certainly a lot of sickness going around....I bet it was disappointing. Hoping for the best for you and your dh.

  2. Oh wow, how disappointing not to meet her! And I'm sorry for the stress your dh feels. Has he shared with his boss about the adoption and would they be more understanding? I mean it's not like he's playing hookey....

    Anyway prayers as you wait and discern!

  3. I had a few meltdowns during our adoption process, it is so stressful! The money, trusting the BM and the agency, it is all so hard. Prayers that it all works out and you have a baby in your arms in 2015!

  4. Wow, so much going on! You and your husband will be in my prayers.


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