Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Good News

This year for the first time teachers will get a growth score that rates how their students did on the state test compared to others students from across the state. They compare each student's score from last year to this year. They used some crazy impossible to understand formula to figure this all out. They decide how much each student should improve and then figure out if they did or not.

Each teacher earns one of four growth ratings (Highly Effective, Effective, Developing, Ineffective) and a growth score from 0-20 points.From stated ed's website "approximately 7% of teachers earned Highly Effective, or student growth was "well above the State average for similar students"; 77% of teachers earned Effective, or student growth "equal to the average for similar students"; 10% earned Developing or "below average growth for similar students"; and 6% earned Ineffective or "well-below average growth for similar students."

 My district has high needs and low resources. This means many of my students are on free lunch. My students also have a lot of challenges at home etc. Teaching them math when their life is unstable is very hard. I love my job and I love the challenge of helping them move forward. I put in many many hours. I tutor kids after school.

I busted my butt all year. When I heard that teachers were getting rated this year, I thought that I better get a good score or I will lose it. This year my students improved from 68% passing on last year's test to 84% this year but who knew if that was good enough or not.

Today I got my score. I did really well. I got 18 which is highly effective. I shed some tears of joy bc I worked so hard. Then my principal told me that only two teachers in our building got this rating. At first I was shocked but then I went home and saw online that it was only 7% of all the teachers in the state, so 2 is actually great for our school.

My first reaction was that I did not want anyone to know. I got thinking that others are going to ask me about my score and what do I say? I started to think about all the negative things that could happen. I guess I got a flashback to high school when you got an award  and someone would call you a nerd. My principal said the scores were private and he was not allowed to tell anyone. Later on parents will be able to request your score and then they could post it on FB if they wanted to.

When I got home and saw only 7% across the state got this rating, my attitude changed. I thought that maybe they should recognize us. Each year there is an award assembly for the whole district. They give out pins etc. Would I really be ok with it? I don't know.

I do think that State ed should have a special dinner and invite all the teachers and give us a certificate. I worked really hard. I want something nice to frame. I don't know if I will be able to get this rating next year so I want to enjoy it now.

I am so exited about this. It was perfect timing to have something nice happen. I could really use this.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Feeling Crabby (Updated)

Today I feel like a real crab. I stopped my progesterone on Friday since I had a BFN. Then I expected AF to come today bc that is how predictable it is once I stop the supplements. Yesterday I had some tiny spotting and I thought great let's get this started and over with. Then the spotting stopped. Hmm that was weird bc it never stops once it starts.

Then last night I had horrible hot and cold flashes on and off all night. I thought ok so it must be starting. I woke up and no AF. I got excited and thought maybe it was implantation spotting so I took another test. BFN again.

Then I had nothing all day until around 3pm. I had some more tiny spotting. Then it stopped. Now I have some more. I am staring to get crabby bc I feel that AF is playing with me. I have never had this issue so of course now I am getting worried that something is wrong. Could it be the LDN? Do I have some new issue?

I did not sleep last night, so that is also making me crabby.I am sure that she is just waiting and hiding and will hit me tonight while I am sleeping. erghhhhhhhhhh

I am wondering how long I can keep up with this lack of sleep.

Well, I guess she did not like me talking about her bc AF came back with a vengeance last night.

Friday, August 17, 2012

Completed the First Month of LDN

Today I have been taking LDN for a month. It is also test day.

I am not sure if the LDN is doing anything for my fertility. I will be getting some immune tests done next month to find out. This month was the transition month. I had to ease into this drug by taking 2mg, then 3mg, and finally 4.5 mg.

Every time I upped the dose I had the same symptoms. Crazy vivid dreams that could turn into nightmares. Sleepless nights. I used to always go to sleep right away and would always sleep through the night. This past month has been totally different. I can't go to sleep right away. Then when I do get to sleep, I have dreams or I wake up repeatedly. Some nights I would wake up and then I was totally awake and had to get out of bed and go downstairs.

The weird thing was that I kinda felt tired but not like you would expect.  I was not cranky at all. There was a period of about 2 weeks where I did not sleep, but I was not crabby at all. In fact my dh said that my mood was better. He said that in general I was more even and calmer.

Eventually I could not take the fact that I was not sleeping so I started to take some benedryl post peak. This made it much better. I did wake up once or twice but I was able to get back to sleep.

Now that I am at the end of a month of LDN, my sleeping is starting to get better. Last night was pretty good and I did not take any benedryl.

I had no pms at all this month so at least the LDN did something. 

I took my test today and of course it was negative. I am not sad, I am mad. I have been sticking myself in the belly twice a day all month for nothing.  Also I think the LDN is making me really CSP. I usually have that issue in general, but magnesium makes it all normal. This month has been really bad. I have had to start back on the prunes in addition to the magnesium. UGH

Friday, August 10, 2012

Over 1,000 Page Views Today

 Today I went to check my blog stats and I saw this graph. My first reaction was oh man, I was doing terrible earlier this week. Then I saw that I usually have about 100 visitors each day, which I thought was great. Then I saw that today I had over 1,000. OMG  Of course I had to investigate to see what was so popular.  It was this post  about a website where you can look up food and find out the nutrients in it. I posted that almost a year ago. It was on August 21, 2011. I think it is weird that today so many people found that post, Right????

Today was p+7. There was some drama at the clinic. Which was all me. It was packed today bc there were many men there. I had to wait 45 for a blood draw when they usually take you on time. I noticed that only two women  were called before me. Then when they came out they had US photos in their hands...........UGH so I got really mad that I had to wait behind them, when I would have been done in five min. I know it is stupid, but that's how it is. Then I had to wait all day for the results. They go online to the  patient portal and it usually takes 2 hours. Well they did not post until 4:30 which is closing time, so I think someone forgot to post them.

After waiting all day, I had good numbers so I felt better. My progesterone was 20.6 and my Estrogen was 184. I know that progesterone numbers do not indicate anything about BFPs but I am super excited that my number was that high. That is really good for me. I went back to check my charts. In 2.5 years of charting I have only had a number this high 3 times before today. Two of the three were on PIO. I changed a few things this month and who knows if that affected it. I started LDN and had to take generic prometrium. I started taking lovenox twice a day. At least I can feel comfortable that those changes did not move me backwards. I also had a larger than normal follicle this month which is most likely the culprit.

So to answer the question from the last post, that 21mm follicle was a good thing and it appears that it popped.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Good or Bad?

Summary of my scans this month
CD3 I had a possible cyst on my left. My right which had the dominant last month was clear. =)
CD10 lining looked great. Had a 14mm and 17mm on the left. Right was still clear.
CD13 lining looked great. Had a 14mm and 21mm and  on left. Right was clear. (Today)

The weird thing is that I have not gotten a +opk yet. Every month without fail,  I have always gotten a +opk at the same time when the follicle was about 18mm. So I was very surprised to see 21mm without one. I use clearblue easy monitor sticks. They measure estrogen and LH. Since the estrogen line got lighter I knew that my estrogen was high. Also yesterday I had tons of 10KL so I thought today I would get a +OPK. 

I am very concerned about LUFS this month since my body has not made LH on its own and it is time.. If you've been following me that has been a major battle for me. I am taking my trigger tonight so there is a chance.

One thing that is different this month is that I started taking LDN. Dr. Boyle said that LDN was not going to give me LUFS. Since napro has used it for years, I trust that it is fine.

The other thing that is different is that I started taking lovenox twice a day instead of once. I have many blood clotting issues so I figured it was time to step it up.

So who knows what is going on. This could be a good thing. Maybe getting my follicle to 21mm is better than 18mm??? or its a sign of LUFS.

FX that it will pop.