Woke up and it was CD 1. This was only a 21 day cycle. That has been the norm for me for awhile so I was kind of expecting it, but still in denial hoping that it would not show for another week. One of these days I will deal with this and see the dr for more progesterone. I was not feeling well and was not looking forward to a long drive to see my family. I did want want to go but I made dh promise me the other day that he would make us go bc I had not seen my family in a few months. The car ride was easy, the roads were full but no major traffic jams.
We walk in the door and were greeted by family members. It was nice and I was really happy that I made it. Then my mom pulls me aside to tell me that my cousin who is not married got his girlfriend pregnant and she is having a girl due in Sept. Woah ambush. He is 32 so at least he is not too young, but it was a total surprise since I think that first time she came around was Thanksgiving so I know that they have not been dating that long. That means it was unplanned and did not take long. UMMM so jealous. At least I found out about my cousin's baby in person and not on FB.
They are both quiet and shy so I think they were also embarrassed at not being married so things were mostly quiet about it. At first I was relived bc I was still in shock and panic mode and was not sure if I would be able to make it. At the end of the night, I was starting to feel better about it, but I was still very sad for myself and my parents.
There were three small children there and so of course everyone talks about them and how cute they are and how they wish there were more children around........ummm burn. Then of course everyone loves to start telling birth stories. My sister gave birth in her car and we had to hear that story again...........ergh oh and then she says how it cost her $3,000 to have her child bc that is her deductible. I had to bite my tongue. Yeah I am sure that for most fertile people who have fertile friends who pay little to nothing for the hospital that is a lot of money. I have already put down $8,000 deposit and have nothing to show for it so paying $3,000 to bring home a healthy baby is pocket change.
Over all I had a nice visit and I was glad that I came. I had a lot of nice conversations with family members. I played with some of the kids which was fun.
Thank you for your blog. I'm like you and waiting to adopt and it's soooooooooooo hard to wait and all the frustrations of not getting a baby are so heart breaking. Family holidays with all the nieces and nephews, all my fertile sisters always being pregnant and complaining about how fertile they are, the list goes on. But let's unite it all with Jesus' suffering, knowing that somehow new life will come from that and the Lord never disappoints those who trust in him. You are in my prayers!
ReplyDeleteOuch...nothing like getting pg news at a family get together when you are not expecting it. It's happened to me as well. Glad you got through it okay and made the best out of the family gathering. Somehow I have to believe that situations like that make us stronger. Praying for you!
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